Solitude
Initially, Rock Oak Trail was going to be an easy little hike to show you where my New Jersey nature adventures began in earnest back in 2007. But I like to change my mind on the fly, so it ended up being an 11 mile fight for survival against bugs, urges to nap, and rocks. Holy sh*t, all the f***ing rocks. For you, however, I imagine a 6-7 mile (not sure of the exact mileage) peaceful stroll through the forest. Why the difference? Preparation and expectations. The expectations weren’t of the forest but of myself, and I didn’t live up to them. I won’t go into detail. You’re welcome.
This is a lollipop route that begins at the Rock Oak Trailhead off Deckertown Turnpike (Click Here for Map). You can drive in to a small parking area along the trail. Word of caution, though; if you have a low profile vehicle, I would advise not driving it down the trail, unless, of course, you really don’t give a crap about your car. I was even a little nervous in my Jeep Renegade, but my 17″ tires were sufficient to keep me from scraping bottom. But if your car sits low to the ground, I would advise parking on the side of Deckertown Turnpike and walking in. There’s space on the side of the road, and it’s a short walk.
According to the map, which you can download HERE, Rock Oak is a 1.5 mile, multi-use trail that traverses a small ridge and passes an old logging deck. I don’t know what they’re talking about. I walked the entire trail back and forth twice and didn’t see any logging deck. But in their defense, I’m easily distracted and forgot I was supposed to be looking for a logging deck, after about two minutes. So, if you go out there and you find this mythical logging deck, would you take a photo of it for me? Please and thank you.
As you make your way along Rock Oak Trail in late April, ferns are unfurling, leaves are beginning to burst from their buds, and flowers are awakening from their winter slumber. You will walk along luxurious stretches of soft moss as birds serenade one another with their spring songs. Oh my gosh, wasn’t that poetic? What struck me hardest was just how peaceful it was, and the same held true for the entire hike. I get the sense that these three trails don’t get a lot of traffic. “Peaceful” will seem contradictory in just a moment, but I envision peace for you.
At the end of Rock Oak, make a right and follow the woods road. This was my favorite stretch. It was already very green and lush, and there was a little swamp along the way. Anyone who knows me, knows how much I love swamps, and it was all I could to keep from spending the rest of the day there. I had not yet noticed the weight of the 20 lbs of photo and video gear I was carrying, and the bugs were only slightly annoying at this point.
Follow this grassy road until you get to Deep Root Trail on the left. If you get to the massive tangle of mylar balloons stuck in a tree, you’ve gone too far. Yeah, I tried to get them down, but they were really tangled up. I plan to go back to see if I can remove them, but then you won’t know if you’ve gone too far. Oh well. You’ll figure it out. The trailhead is really obvious; you’ll see it. I believe in you. No. Really. I do.
Deep Root was a bit mushy and and there were a number of little, vernal pools, some with frog spawn. I just like saying frog spawn. Frog spawn. Frog Spawn. FROG SPAWN!!! Hahahahaha. Sorry, at this point I’m starting to go stark raving mad because the bugs aren’t just trying to take up residence in my nostrils, they’re also dive bombing my eyeballs.
Allow me to be your cautionary tale. Bring the damned bug spray WITH you, okay. Don’t just lightly spray your pants and hat before you go. I mean, a couple more ounces on top of 20 lbs isn’t gonna make that much of a difference, and it will be your incentive to drink more water to lighten the load. But don’t drink too much too fast, because you only brought enough for, like, a five mile hike!
Okay, where was I?
Oh yeah, as you near the end of Deep Root Trail, you’ll descend a small, rocky hill. Rocky. Hahaha. Yeah, right. Just wait. In a few minutes it will seem like a smooth glide across a frozen pond. At the bottom of the hill is a small creek, or maybe it’s a babbling brook. Either way, you’re gonna want to stop and take in the serenity of it cuz you’re gonna need to hold onto as much of that shit as possible for what’s coming next. What’s that you ask? Well, as you cross the stream you’ll turn left onto Criss Trail, which follows along the brook. Keep taking that in and try to not look too far ahead. No need to rush.
But you can’t stop the inevitable. The map guide describes Criss Trail thusly: “moderately sloped, moving along a boulder-strewn hillside.” Boulder-strewn hillside? That’s hilarious. When I think “boulder-strewn hillside,” I’m thinking the gods took a few boulders and tossed them around–a few over here; a few over there. No. That is not what this is. This is the seventh circle of rock hell. For as far as you can see, fucking rocks. And I’m sorry–no I’m not–I was trying to make this family friendly, but fuck you and your fucking rocks. And by “you” I mean whoever put those fucking rocks there.
So I was really starting to feel the 20 lbs of photo and video gear on my back. Ankles were screaming, knees were screaming, glutes were screaming, I was screaming–mostly level four cursies, and I finally emerged from rock hell. I don’t remember much of the rest of the trail because I was too busy debating with myself, “Should I drink the rest of my water now or wait until I get back to Rock Oak Trail? Anyway, you’ll finally come to the woods road again and make a left. You’ll have to climb up a long, stupid hill before arriving back at Rock Oak, but you’ve still got 1.5 miles of agony to go. And the nightmare will be over.
I know it seems like I didn’t really enjoy this hike, and I didn’t. But you will, because you’ll be better prepared.
Click on image to enlarge
For more information on Stokes State Forest click HERE.
